Maybe i never got over this person and talking to him again just helped those dormant feels along.

I say maybe, but i realise that it’s true. I came to this conclusion in the midst of an identity breakdown at work the other night. This is just a symptom of everything I’ve been feeling and i felt a release in owning that maybe I have always been invested. Maybe I never stopped. Maybe I wasn’t able to shake off the feels as easily as I’d hoped.
This is fine, because I learnt from this experience. Owning it means I can let it go, i think.  It means that I don’t have to hold a candle for someone who will not do the same for me.

I will say that it’s helped me realise the type of person I want. I want a fighter. Because i know I’m the type of person who will fight for the one I love. Fight for his dreams, fight for the greatness in him. And i want someone who will do the same for me.

Settling is nice, but at this point it’s not an option.